"I wanna tell you something, at a certain point in your life, probably when too much of it has gone by. You will open your eyes, and see yourself for who you are. Especially for everything that made you so different from all the awful normals. And you will say to yourself but I am this person, and in that statement, there will be a kind of love. " - Phoebe In Wonderland

July 12, 2005

replies from a heavy heart...

its late but i'm still up.... result of excessive caffeine....
my current emotion's like a bull in a china shop, clumsy n senseless. after psyching myself 4 so long in believing i'm enjoying singlehood, loneliness sets in, lost n afraid, nowhere to find security... hurting both ways (self n others) unintentionally, crying but only from the inside, heart aches for no reason or rhyme. apprehensive to let any1 in. any remedies? i'm afraid i can only let it fade away by itself. n its killing me....

Your smile
My medication
Your words
My encouragement
Your hugs
My blanket of security
Your kisses
My candy
You
My source of happiness
this short poem... (borrowed from sheena)
____________________________________________________
unknowingly, momentarily taken the bitterness outta this aching heart and added a tinge of light into the bottomless pit of hopelessness.
as i gaze into the white wall behind my comp, it immediately turns into a screen as my eyes becomes a projector replaying the scenes from initial D. the intensity of the movie still vivid in my mind depicting the romance, the car chase, the passion of racing, relationship(father n son), and friendships.
yet another nite has come to an end... the day is breaking soon in a couple of hours, slp has become an uninvited guest to this foriegn mass. however somehow necessary to a certain extend. therefore my departure from this slpless dimension is crucial. nite

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